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TILDA SWINTON won the Academy Award last night. She’s an amazing actress and looks almost like an alien which makes her even cooler. Which is funny because FERN says she’s one of his good friends. They worked on the film THUMBSUCKER together in PORTLAND but I use the term “together” lightly, for as far as I understand it Fern’s main job was driving a truck.

PORTLAND PORTLAND PORTLAND. Fern knows everyone there. When I found this Portland Mixtape Fern obviously knew the DJ too. “Sara gave me this dope mixtape by Erock’s partner, “EJ” (air quotation marks), and I played it all summer while driving around in the wardrobe truck.”

Besides the music on this tape, Fern’s favorite thing about Portland is the lack of sales tax. Sounds like a magical land to me.

LISTEN!!! – The Dazed and Confused PORTLAND MIXTAPE